ELMO: AHHH.. help me.. save me.. rescuse me..

eh.. BEN went to FAJAR MAC..

auntie sandy: HELLO.. wad can i do for u..

BENIE: hi.. eh.. i want a set of BIG MAC.. upsize.. change drink to ice lemon tea without ice..

auntie sandy: hmm.. ice lemon tea without ice = lemon tea?

BENIE: arbo.. if not green tea ah..

auntie sandy: ohhh.. give e a sec..

a sec passed.

BENIE: oi.. 1 sec up. ==

BENIE: eh.. ps.. i tink i prefer ice milo without ice.. i gg bball ltr.. nid drink milo give energy..

auntie sandy: oi.. cb la.. ice milo without ice = milo la..

BENIE: arbo.. if not coffee ah..

auntie sandy v angry**

auntie sandy: chee bye want energy go buy red bull la.. blue cans one.. v powerful yo.. i and my husband every drink red bull now gt 20kids liao..

BENIE: so...? my business? i want ice milo without ice not kids.. faster la.. are u gg kill the cow and cut the meat and patt it and cook it and serve me?

auntie sandy give elmo face.. 0.0

after few min.. she give me some kind of weird ice milo .. more like milo ice cream.. big mac that is flat.. fries look like 5 leggy momo..? hahaaa.

1) BRAIN TUMOR:

Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?
Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?

Doctor: Then why are you so happy?
Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!

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2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:

Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bean: 9

Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!

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3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:

Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.
Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!

.

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4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:

Friend: What are you looking at?
Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.

Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!

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5) Marriage:

Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?
Mr. Bean: 16

Friend: Why?
Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse.

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6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:

Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?
Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture. Friend: What tape did you took anyway?
Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.

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7)DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:
Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom's dead.
Friend: condolence, my friend.

(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder
Friend: what now?Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!

.

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8) MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:

Colleague: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.
Mr. Bean: That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.

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9) Spelling lesson:

Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful....is it one c or two c?
Mr. Bean: Make it three c to be sure!

One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw
> two men along the roadside eating grass.
>
>
> Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.
>
> He asked one man 'Why are you eating grass?'
>
> 'We don't have any money for food,' the poor man replied 'We have to
> eat grass.'
>
> 'Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you', the
> lawyer said.
>
> 'But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there,
> under that tree'.
>
> 'Bring them along,' the lawyer replied.

>
> Turning to the other poor man he stated, 'You come with us also.'

>
> The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, 'But sir, I also have a
> wife and SIX children with me!'

>
> 'Bring them all, as well,' the lawyer answered.
>
> They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as
> large as the limousine was.
>
> Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said,
> 'Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you.'
>
> The lawyer replied, 'Glad to do it. You'll really love my place; the
> grass is almost 1 metre high!'

>
> Lesson : Don't trust kind lawyers.